Wednesday, February 17, 2010

In these four weeks of exploring and reflecting on James Hollis' first idea of what matters most, that our lives not be governed by fear, I've become more aware of my own fears and what activates them.  I've looked at my various strategies for dealing with them and attempted to act more quickly in stopping them in their tracks before they take up residence and call the shots in my life. 

I've listened and read as others have spoken and written about their own fears, and I've responded to e-mails and personal conversations about the topic.  It is clear to me fear is a universal force that every human being has, to one degree or another, and dealing with our fears is a lifelong project and a one-day-at-a-time challenge.  In fact, I've come to agree with Jim Hollis that the real heroes among us are the everyday people who get up every morning and in spite of their fears or because of them go on to work anyway, pay their bills, take care of their daily tasks and then start all over again the next day. 

It's not that easy being a human being, my young friend said when she was four, and indeed it is not.  "Winning" in the context of these blog posts is about choosing not to be governed by fear or the tendency to avoid our fears or overcompensate for them in some way that makes sense to us, but isn't helpful.

Eternal vigilance really is the price of freedom, and so we all have to stay on-task with facing the fears in our own lives.   Each stage of life presents new and different ways fear can overtake us.  We are winners not by competing or winning medals, when it comes to dealing with our fears; we win when we determine that our lives will be governed by love, courage, tolerance, generosity, compassion and boldness.  We win, not in the ways we typically think about winning, but when we can get over ourselves and reach out to others in a zillion different ways to help and heal, encourage and inspire, support and nurture our fellow human being.

This quote of Carl Jung's included in Jim's first chapter and in an earlier post bears repeating:  "The spirit of evil is negation of the life force by fear.  Only boldness can deliver us from fear, and if the risk is not taken, the meaning of life is violated."

Carl Jung also believed that the only cure for an addiction, including the addiction to fear, is a bigger god, and I know for sure that being governed by fear is a deeply spiritual issue.  After 9/11 Dean Alan Jones of Grace Cathedral in San Francisco asserted in a sermon that we have two choices, love or fear.  The reason that Jesus said over and over, "Fear not!" is that he knew how prevalent the force of fear was and is for us, and he knew how powerful it is to choose to give it up and choose to live in courage and in love.

I believe and affirm a truth that my mother shared with me when I was a young woman.    This truth, an antidote for our fears, has been a vital part of my own life; I have recalled it at some pretty scary moment.  "God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of love, power and a sound mind."  (2 Timothy 1:6)  When I am afraid, I can offer that fear to God and ask that the vaccuum be filled with love, power and a sound mind.

Over time I have learned the reality and power of turning over my fears to the Power greater than myself.  I affirm and assert that God's great adequacy does in fact meet me at the points of my own inadequacy.  Working the Twelve Steps with my afflictive feelings, I have learned how important it is to follow through to that last step and model courage in the face of my fears.  Sometimes we have to "prop each other up on the leaning side," as my mother said, by borrowing courage from each other.  Certainly we have an opportunity to speak courage and live courage with our children, and perhaps it is our moral obligation.

Next week, I will begin exploring the second idea that really matters from Jim's book:  Saving the appearances:  that we learn to tolerate ambiguity.

Please join me on this journey of living a more considered life.  I like your responses!

Grace to you in the middle of this week --
Jeanie

(This is the fourth in a four week series of reflections based on Chapter One of the book WHAT MATTERS MOST:  LIVING A MORE CONSIDERED LIFE,  by James Hollis.    You can order Jim's books from here -- http://www.junghouston.org or from http://www.amazon.com.     You can also order CDs of his lecture from this course from the Jung Center in Houston.           Previous posts from this series can be found by clicking "What Matters" on the home page of this website.)

Monday, February 15, 2010

Over the past four weeks, I've been writing on this website about the big idea that our lives not be governed by fear.  Inspired by James Hollis' book WHAT MATTERS MOST: LIVING A MORE CONSIDERED LIFE, I've taken this first idea from his book and meandered around it, attempting to integrate the truth of that idea into my own life.  Last weekend, I remembered that one of the ways to counter fear is to be around people of great courage, generosity and humility.

When I was a child my mother taught me that who you listen to -- who you spend your time with -- what you put in your mind --matters, and I am encouraged and revived from a weekend conference at Truett Seminary where Walter Brueggemann spoke on prophetic preaching.

There is something inspiring and thrilling about listening to a Master Teacher who is so at-one with his work that there is a seamlessness between the message and the messenger.  To be in the presence of a person who has devoted his life to the study of the Old Testament out of passion and love for the scriptures, and to listen to someone whose breadth of knowledge, depth of wisdom and insight and skill in imparting what he knows is life-giving.  I was so energized and inspired by Dr. Brueggemann's lectures that it is like they have taken up residence in my head and heart.  I was blessed by his gracious and generous spirit.

As I have gone back over my notes from this conference, turning them over in my mind with the theme about which I've been writing on this website, that our lives not be governed by fear,  I was struck with how true it is that being with Light-bearers who have great courage and deep wisdom is one of the ways to relinquish a life governed by fear and receive a life filled with hope and promise.

The deep truths conveyed by Dr. Brueggemann do have the power to counteract fear.  Wading in the deep waters of profound wisdom, contemplating the vibrant realities of life-giving principles and reflecting deeply on the possibilities that authentic, bold and unembroidered honesty open up in my imagination, I was reminded again that knowing the truth -- that is, accepting it, engaging with it, wrestling with it and attempting to live it -- really can set you free.   Just being in the presence of persons who dare to live and speak the wisdom that matters made me feel less afraid and anxious and more empowered to live with courage.  Being with people of bold courage activates my own courage.

My mother was right.  We must choose our friends and teachers carefully.

My friends in A.A. know this truth, as well.  "Stick with the winners," they say.  "The losers will get you drunk."

Sometimes I think that we live in a culture drunk on fear. 

I am profoundly grateful for the bold courage of Walter Brueggemann.

I'm so grateful for Hulitt Gloer's leadership in making this converence happen.  I am deeply thankful for the powerful gifts of Kyle Matthews, Al Staggs and Todd Still, all of whom brought excellence and passion to the conference.

I'm so grateful to the parents of Kyle Lake for their generosity, a generosity that not only inspires and touches me deeply, but reminds me of the ways in which great courage and generosity are intertwined.

I'm so proud of the people at Truett Seminary for making teachers and  prophets like Walter Brueggemann available for those of us who need to hear deep truths and be encouraged by them.

What about you?  Who inspires you to rise above your fears?

Whose life gives you courage?  Who calls forth the best in you?

Who gives you grace?  And to whom do you extend grace?

On this Monday, grace.....to you --

Jeanie

(Saturday's column for the San Angelo Standard Time can be found here: http://www.gosanangelo.com/news/2010/feb/12/love-is-best-gift-to-give-a-valentine/)